Before they called it an “addiction,” plenty of biblical figures fell victim to the same snare that took down Tiger. But where was their rehab?
Now that Tiger Woods is returning to golf next week to play in the Masters, does this mean he’s cured of sex addiction?
By now you know Woods was caught cheating on his wife, Elin, with multiple women, so he checked into sex rehab. Other high-profile people have done the same. Just today, it was announced that Sandra Bullock’s allegedly unfaithful husband, Jesse James, is taking his turn.
So I guess the biblical King David, who had multiple wives but just had to have one more who was already married, should’ve cried “sex addiction made me do it” too.
Face it. People cheat. Men do it. Women do it. Celebrities, politicians, executives, homemakers, and ministers do it. Crying sex addiction is not about seeking help, but saving face. It’s a weak excuse that does a disservice to people who truly have hypersexual disorders because of childhood abuse or other sexual trauma. It can also deceive the rest of us into thinking we’re immune from adultery.
There’s a debate among psychiatrists as to whether sex addiction actually exists. The American Psychiatric Association doesn’t list it in its mental disorders manual, but may add it to the 2013 edition. Experts say hypersexual activity is so difficult to manage that it interrupts everyday life functions. Like an alcoholic, gambler, or crack addict craving the next fix, it’s difficult for someone who craves sex to focus on anything else. I doubt Woods could’ve dominated golf while battling a major addiction.
During his televised confession and apology, Woods reaffirmed his commitment to his Buddhist faith. He wisely identified the problem dead on.
“The issue involved here was my repeated irresponsible behavior,” he said. “I was unfaithful. I had affairs. I cheated. What I did is not acceptable, and I am the only person to blame.”
Right. Not sex addiction. Sin.
The thing we are all susceptible to.
Sexual sin has been around since the beginning of time. It’s documented throughout the Bible. Mainly it’s us guys who have had trouble keeping our tunics and zippers up, but women cheat too. Take, for example, the desperate housewife that hit on Joseph (Gen. 39:13-16). Joseph, at twentysomething-years-old, displayed the character and discipline that few men of any faith would have. He jumped up and fled. I wouldn’t dare deceive myself by guaranteeing that I would’ve chosen the same.
Anyone who has been married for a while knows the journey has rocky turns and hills. It’s a marathon, not a sprint. And without God at the center, the covenant can become a labor without love. So as a married man in the middle of a 17-plus year marathon, I feel for Woods and his wife, Elin. Things go wrong. Sin makes justification appealing. Mistakes are made. Feelings are hurt and ripped. But a couple, even a celebrity couple, ought to be able to work things out before God without cameras rolling and flashing.
That’s the advantage King David had. After impregnating Bathsheba and having her husband killed to cover it up, he eventually confessed his sin to God. He suffered the consequences — the lost of their newborn son. He mourned and moved on. No sex addiction excuse to save face. God’s grace was sufficient rehab.
When a person falls, hypocrites gather stones. Then later it’s often unveiled that they were hiding their own rocks. For example, former Sen. John Edwards condemned President Clinton during his impeachment tied to Monica Lewinsky, though Edwards voted to acquit.
Now he has a love child and is in divorce court after his affair during his own presidential run. The next time you hear someone who is adamant toward a particular sin, realize they’re probably a closet sinner.
Jesus counsels on the matter in John 8 where accusers brought an adulteress before him.
“He who is without sin, cast the first stone,” Jesus told the accusers, before offering forgiveness to the woman. “Go and sin no more,” he said to her.
“Go play golf and sin no more,” is the cure for Woods.
Tiger Woods photo by Keith Allison from Wikipedia.
Thanks for this report. I actually think sex addiction does exist and that it’s both a psychological and spiritual issue. But your right, only God can cure it.
I appreciate the thoughts on Tiger’s troubles and humanity’s frailties in general. However, I strongly disagree with the tone and substance in regard to sexual addiction. While there may be those (perhaps especially celebrities?) who check in to sex rehab for a quick fix but fail to take responsibility for their behavior, that is not at all what claims of sex addiction are about for most people. With respect, it is clear that you have not interacted with everyday people who claim the burden of sex addiction for themselves. It is not an excuse or an attempt to abdicate responsibility. It is a profound admission of powerlessness combined with the desire to do the will of one’s higher power. The recognition that one’s life was unmanageable and that one is powerless to change it absent an infusion of grace is the ultimate example owning one’s behavior. It’s not about excuses; it’s about breaking through the denial, admitting one has a problem, and taking responsibility for living a healthy life.
I appreciate your thoughts, but I feel that your the article was lacking in compassion for those who found a path to freedom in calling their sexual problem an addiction and working 12 step recovery programs.